When Achieving Your Goals Gets in the Way of Self-Love—Part 2

(If you haven’t read part 1 of this series, please go back and read it from last week before reading today’s post.)

Creating awareness of your present thoughts is the first step to self-love. It’s common to have negative self-talk running in a loop in our habit brains. For many, it’s thoughts of, “I’m not worthy of love,” “I’m so stupid,” or some variation of a shame-inducing thought that keeps us down and wanting to focus on our futures instead of our present. We think we can work our way out of these thoughts and feelings, but it can’t happen. Worth and value can’t be earned. They have to accepted as a basic part of who we are. “I am worthy because I exist as a human on this planet.” Period.

I’ve seen women who punish themselves because of who they are in the present. “I can’t buy new clothes until I am a size smaller,” even though the clothes they have are worn or outdated. I’ve seen women who avoid any type of confrontation at work even though they are in management positions where conflict is expected and necessary. All of these behaviors are a result of not liking or being confident in who we are, and it is critical that we become present with our self-talk to determine what