When I told you last week that I quit believing in myself after I didn’t get the fellowship, I didn’t tell you how far I let my fear of failure go.
I let my fear creep into my personal life as well. I met and married a guy who wasn’t right for me (and vice versa), and before I did, I laid in bed every night saying to myself, “I can be content with this life. I don’t have to be in love; I can be content.”
I mourn the young woman who had so much available to her in life, but she was too afraid to live. I don’t want you to settle because life can be so amazing and full when we give up the fear!
There are only three steps to giving up your fear and learning to overestimate yourself, and who can’t master three steps?!?
Step 1: Commit to journaling daily.
Okay, ladies. I know you’ve heard me say this before. I talk ad nauseum about journaling, but that’s because IT WORKS! You don’t even have to do it very long. Journaling daily means devoting 5 minutes a day to writing out the thoughts in your head.
Consider it your self-care. If you dread it, it will always be a burden. If you look at it as devoting time to yourself for growth and enjoyment, you will learn to appreciate it. Think of it this way: if I told you to get a weekly massage, you’d probably find a way to make it happen. Journaling is free and takes a fraction of the time, but it can achieve it better results!
So how do you do it? The following are my suggestions. Once you get into a routine, you may find something else that works for you, but this is how I make it happen.
· Get a notebook to devote to journaling. This isn’t required; sometimes I don’t have my notebook with me, but I need to get my thoughts on paper, so I’ll use whatever is around me. However, generally, it’s nice to have a notebook to keep everything together. You can go back and follow your progress much easier this way too!
· Get some pens you enjoy using. I am not all about fancy pens, but it does feel nice to use a good pen as I’m pouring my soul onto the page. ;)
· Find a consistent space and time to journal. Consistency means a lot in any self-development journey. You’re much more likely to show up each day if you carve the habit into your physical space as well as your calendar.
· Set a timer for 5 minutes. While it may be difficult to write the entire time at first, once you get started, you’ll be surprised at how quickly it goes. Setting a timer is also a hack for those of you who dread it. It gives it a definite time limit.
· Keep writing no matter what! This is a hack I have been teaching my students for year. If you run out of things to say, don’t stop writing. Write anything that comes into your mind, including “blah, blah, I can’t think of anything …”! It’s important not to stop writing because eventually your stream of consciousness will lead you to a new thought if you persist.
That’s all you need to do to create a daily journaling practice!
Next week I’ll be back with Step 2 of the 3-step process. Go ahead and start journaling this week because we’ll use your writing to complete step 2!
Until then, much love!
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